Cognitive-behavioral therapy books and websites:

  • I highly recommend the book Mind Over Mood, 2nd Edition, by Dennis Greenberger & Christine A. Padesky. Padesky maintains a related website at The website has links to a selection of videos and audios that relate to Mind Over Mood, downloadable worksheets, FAQs, and more.
  • For a similar but slightly different approach to cognitive-behavioral therapy, I also recommend books and materials by Dr. David Burns. His website is, where you can find descriptions of his books as well as links to many free, useful resources, including his podcast and blog, free anxiety and depression courses, symptom rating scales, and worksheets called "Daily Mood Journal" and "Recovery Circle."
  • Thoughts and Feelings, by Matthew McKay, Martha Davis, & Patrick Fanning (I have the 4th edition and don't know if that's the most recent).
  • The Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Workbook for Personality Disorders, by Jeffrey C. Wood (even though it’s billed as being for people with personality disorders, it’s got good general information that would be useful for anyone).
  • The moodgym program ( is like an interactive self-help book which helps you to learn and practice skills which can help to prevent and manage symptoms of depression and anxiety.
  • is a service for people seeking information about Dialectical Behavior Therapy, a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy that incorporates mindfulness and interpersonal effectiveness.

Resources for learning about nonviolent communication (NVC):

  • Here's a wonderful 13 minute video that explains NVC, in particular vulnerable honesty:
  • The publisher of official NVC books and pamphlets is Puddle Dancer Press (, and there are also some additional resources at this website.
  • Judy Burrill is a local NVC teacher and consultant whom I highly recommend:
  • Connection Central ( is a free website with the latest articles from NVC trainers. It's a way to stay up-to-date on what trainers are thinking, how they're living NVC in their own lives, or how they're feeling about world events.
  • Camp Stomping Ground is an overnight camp in the Catskills Mountains outside Binghamton, NY "building radically empathic communities through humble curiosity, personal responsibility, restorative practices, and unbounded curiosity."
  • Bay NVC ( offers many free resources in its “Educational Materials,” including online audio, video, articles, and worksheets.
  • Brooklyn-based NVC consultant Dian Killian also has some good handouts and worksheets on her website:
  • The NVC Academy offers telecourses and webinars, many of which include recordings and printed materials:
  • Each summer there's a week-long intensive workshop in NVC called the New York NVC Intensive. I attended the intensive in 2007 and found it so inspiring and informative; I highly recommend it. Here's the link:
  • The Center for Nonviolent Communication ( offers both resources and a listing of live in-person workshops and classes in NVC.

Miscellaneous online resources:

Family Communication, Parenting, and Children:

  • Motivational Interviewing (“MI”) is a communication style that health professionals use to talk with patients about making healthy changes, and it is based on the premise that the best way to influence another person’s behavior is by respecting their autonomy and creating space for them to explore their own ambivalence and (hopefully) motivation for change. Dr. Emily Kline and colleagues at Boston University have developed "MILO" (Motivational Interviewing for Loved Ones) and offer a free e-course called "The School of Hard Talks Online" ( which you can do at your own pace to learn MILO skills. The e-course has 7 modules, each of which takes about 10 minutes to complete. You can view the modules as many times as you like. 
  • Here are six of the best parenting resources recommended by top developmental, clinical, and family psychologists:
  • Cornell Cooperative Extension has many family and parenting resources on their website (, and offers excellent parenting skills workshops periodically (
  • The Organization for Psychoeducational Tutoring (OPT) is a nonprofit organization founded here in Ithaca and directed by psychiatrist Dr. Joseph Strayhorn: OPT provides affordable, in-home tutoring by telephone to teach children psychological and academic skills that make life better, such as: temper control/handling frustration; focusing/getting things accomplished; being confident and brave; getting along with people/building friendships/being kind; get enjoyment out of things; making wise decisions; reading fluency; reading comprehension; and math.

Couples and Relationships:

  • The Gottman Institute ( takes a research-based approach to relationships. I've taken the first level of their therapist training, and incorporate their methods in my work with couples. They have excellent books, videos, other resources, which you can order from the website. The website also offers information about workshops for couples and a directory of therapists who are trained in their methods.
  • Fair Play is a book and card deck by Eve Rodsky, which outlines a system for how to divide up household tasks fairly. There's also a documentary about it, and you can read about it at
  • Terry Real, founder of Relational Life Therapy and a couples therapist I admire very much, wrote a book published in 2022 called Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. You can read about his book and his approach, as well as access his resources, at his website,
  • The Love Multiverse ( also provides scientifically-based advice, information, ideas, and suggestions on how to find and keep the love of your life.
  • The National Coalition for Sexual Health has launched this guide to address sexual concerns and increase pleasure:

Anxiety, Social Anxiety, Social Skills, Perfectionism, OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder):

  • When Perfect Isn't Good Enough, by Martin M. Antony & Richard P. Swinson
  • The Anti-Anxiety Workbook, by Martin M. Antony & Peter J. Norton
  • This website, published by the American Psychological Association, offers tools and strategies for helping children and teens manage their stress and anxiety:
  • This website is loaded with useful information about adult anxiety disorders and how to effectively treat them:
  • is a free public service of distinguished psychologist Reid Wilson, Ph.D., who is director of the Anxiety Disorders Treatment Center in Chapel Hill, NC. The website includes free informative videos and other kinds of help. 
  • The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook, by Martin M. Antony & Richard P. Swinson
  • This website ( has been helpful for people who feel anxious in social situations or feel that their social skills are weak.
  • When Perfect Isn't Good Enough, by Martin M. Antony & Richard P. Swinson
  • Binghamton Anxiety Clinic ( offers comprehensive anxiety assessment and cognitive-behavioral therapy for both adults and children suffering from Social Phobia or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, with sliding scale fees.
  • I highly recommend books by Jon Hershfield, who is both an expert at treating OCD and an OCD sufferer himself. Hershfield's book The Mindfulness Workbook for OCD ( is one of the first to take a humane, gradual view of OCD treatment. Hershfield's key ideas include: Focus  on being present with a trigger, but not emotionally reacting to it. Notice the disgust or fear, but don't engage with it. Don't over do it; take small steps.
  • Hershfield has two additional, excellent books: Everyday Mindfulness for OCD ( and The OCD Workbook for Teens ( 
  • Self-compassion is a very important part of OCD treatment. Kristen Neff's website on self-compassion ( is a good overview.
  • Another important treatment strategy for OCD is a variety of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy called ACT, which stands for Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. A core idea is to move toward doing more of what's important to you--what you want to be doing--instead of habituating to or tolerating distress. See Marisa T. Mazza's book The ACT Workbook for OCD (

Depression and Bipolar Disorder:

  • Breaking Free from Depression: Pathways to Wellness, by Jesse H. Wright and Laura W. McCray
  • The Mood Repair Toolkit: Proven Strategies to Prevent the Blues from Turning Into Depression, by David A. Clark
  • I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression, by Terrence Real,
  • The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide: What You and Your Family Need to Know (3rd Edition), by David J. Miklowitz
  • The Bipolar Workbook: Tools for Controlling Your Mood Swings (2nd Edition), by Monica Ramirez Basco
  • An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness, by Kay Redfield Jamison
  • Unglued: A Bipolar Love Story, by Jeffrey Zuckerman


  • End the Insomnia Struggle: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Get to Sleep and Stay Asleep, by Colleen Ehrnstrom & Alisha L. Brosse
  • The Insomnia Workbook: A Comprehensive Guide to Getting the Sleep You Need, by Stephanie Silberman
  • Say Goodnight to Insomnia: The Six-Week, Drug-Free Program Developed at Harvard Medical School, by Gregg D. Jacobs
  • You can find a huge amount of evidence-based sleep health information, news, and unbiased product reviews at I'm very impressed with this website.


  • The Anger Management Workbook, by W. Robert Nay
  • Overcoming Anger in Your Relationship, by W. Robert Nay

Body Acceptance and Health at Every Size:

  • What We Don't Talk About When We Talk About Fat, by Aubrey Gordon. It shows how painful it can be as a fat person to have someone talk to you because they are "concerned about your health." Many fat people are healthy, but society does not assume that.
  • The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love, by Sonya Renee Taylor.
  • Here is a blog post with more great resources:

Trauma and PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder):

  • Trauma and Recovery, by Judith Herman, M.D.
  • It's Not You, It's What Happened to You: Complex Trauma and Treatment, by Christine A. Courtois, Ph.D
  • Outgrowing the Pain: A Book for and about Adults Abused as Children, by Eliana Gil, Ph.D.
  • Outgrowing the PainTogether: A Book for Spouses and Partners of Adults Abused as Children, by Eliana Gil, Ph.D.
  • Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse, by Mike Lew
  • Mike Lew leads recovery workshops for men survivors of sexual child abuse, and also workshops for couples in which one partner is a male survivor of sexual child abuse:
  • I Can't Get Over it: A Handbook for Trauma Survivors (Second Edition), by Aphrodite Matsakis, Ph.D.
  • Loving Someone with PTSD: A Practical Guide to Understanding and Connecting with Your Partner after Trauma, by Aphrodite Matsakis, Ph.D.
  • Your Turn for Care: Surviving the Aging and Death of the Adults Who Harmed You, by Laura S. Brown, Ph.D.
  • Not the Price of Admission: Healthy Relationships After Childhood Trauma, by Laura S. Brown, Ph.D.
  • The Finding Solid Ground Program Workbook: Overcoming Obstacles in Trauma Recovery, by Hugo J. Schielke, Bethany L. Brand, & Ruth A. Lanius (2022, Oxford University Press)
  • The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to Regaining Emotional Control and Becoming Whole, by Arielle Schwartz, Ph.D.
  • Finding Life Beyond Trauma: Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to Heal from Post-Traumatic Stress and Trauma-Related Problems, by Victoria M. Follette and Jacqueline Pistorello
  • Resources for people who are trying to recover from the trauma of causing injury or death to another:

Addictive/Habitual Behaviors (e.g., compulsive gambling, compulsive eating, substance abuse), and Motivation to Change:

  • Controlling Your Drinking: Tools to Make Moderation Work for You (2nd Edition), by William R. Miller and Ricardo F. Munoz
  • Sex, Drugs, Gambling, and Chocolate: A Workbook for Overcoming Addictions (Second Edition), by A. Thomas Horvath Ph.D., FAClinP, G. Alan Marlatt PhD, Reid K. Hester PhD (Published 2003 by New Harbinger Publications)
  • The Addiction Recovery Skills Workbook: Changing Addictive Behaviors Using CBT, Mindfulness, and Motivational Interviewing Techniques, by Suzette Glasner-Edwards PhD (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbooks)
  • Yes You Can: 16 Steps for Discovery and Empowerment, by Charlotte Sophia Kasl.
  • The Beyond Addiction Workbook for Family & Friends: Evidence-Based Skills to Help a Loved One Make Positive Change, by Jeffrey Foote, Ph.D., Kenneth Carpenter, Ph.D., and Carrie Wilkens, Ph.D. (Published 2022 by New Harbinger Publications;
  • SMART Recovery is an abstinence-based, not-for-profit organization with a sensible, science-based self-help program for people having problems with drinking and using. Its mission is to empower people to achieve independence from addiction problems. SMART Recovery sponsors face-to-face meetings around the world, daily online meetings, online message board, and 24/7 chat room.
  • The website helps people to stay motivated in their recovery with a mobile app.
  • Changeology: 5 Steps to Realizing Your Goals and Resolutions, by John C. Norcross (Simon & Schuster).
  • Finding Your Way to Change: How the Power of Motivational Interviewing Can Reveal What You Want and Help You Get There, by Allan Zuckoff with Bonnie Gorscak (published May 14, 2015 by Guilford Press)

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD):

  • Understand Your Brain, Get More Done: The ADHD Executive Functions Workbook, by Ari Tuckman. This is such a great book! I've recommended it to many clients. Dr. Tuckman also has a website called "More Attention, Less Deficit" at and a podcast at
  • Jessica McCabe's How to ADHD website ( and YouTube series ( provide evidence-based explanations and advice to hundreds of thousands of viewers--including women of color, transgender people, and other underrepresented groups--and have become a crucial support network for many.
  • The Work Smart Academic Planner (Revised Edition): Write It Down, Get It Done, by Peg Dawson and Richard Guare
  • Train Your Brain for Success: A Teenager's Guide to Executive Functions, by Randy Kulman
  • Parent-Teen Therapy for Executive Function Deficits and ADHD: Building Skills and Motivation, by Margaret H. Sibley
  • Scattered, by Gabor Mate, M.D.

Websites with Transgender Resources:

Books about Transgender Issues:

  • Trans Bodies, Trans Selves: A Resource for the Transgender Community, by Laura Erickson-Schroth
  • Transition and Beyond, Observations on Gender Identity, by Reid Vanderburgh
  • The Transgender Guidebook: Keys to a Successful Transition, by Anne L Boedecker PhD
  • The Gender Quest Workbook: A Guide for Teens and Young Adults Exploring Gender Identity, by Rylan Jay Testa PhD (Author), Deborah Coolhart PhD LMFT (Author), & 3 more
  • The Reflective Workbook for Partners of Transgender People: Your Transition as Your Partner Transitions, by D. M. Maynard.
  • My Trans Parent: A User Guide for When Your Parent Transitions, by Heather Bryant. When a parent transitions, the whole family transitions. Providing tips and advice, information on gender identity and transitioning, and a wealth of real-life stories, this book will guide you through your realative's transition, and your own.
  • Thriving Through Transition: Self-Care for Parents of Transgender Children, by Denise O'Doherty.
  • Transgender Journeys, by Virginia Ramey Mollenkott and Vanessa Sheridan (for Christian transgender people to accept themself)
  • What Does God Think? Transgender People and the Bible, by Cheryl B. Evans (for Christian family members of transgender people)
  • TRANS/gressive: How Transgender Activists Took on Gay Rights, Feminism, the Media & Congress... And Won!, by Riki Wilchins (published Jun 2, 2017 by Riverdale Avenue Books)
  • A Letter to My Trans Sisters, edited by Charlie Craggs, is a collection of myriad transitions and reflections thereof by women around the world. Beyond validating that there is no one way to transition, this book reminds readers that each trans woman transitions from and into much broader contexts than just their own immediate lives.
  • "You're In the Wrong Bathroom!": And 20 Other Myths and Misconceptions About Transgender and Gender Non-Conforming People, by Laura Erickson-Schroth and Laura A. Jacobs.
  • Trans Forming Families: Real Stories about Transgendered Loved Ones, 2nd Edition, by Mary Boenke (editor), features first-person accounts by parents, families, and friends of transgender people who have come to accept and embrace their transgender loved ones. 
  • Transitions of the Heart: Stories of Love, Struggle, and Acceptance by Mothers of Transgender and Gender Variant Children, edited by Rachel Pepper.